RUBY & LULU

On paper: Yorkshire Terriers.

In practice: Two highly trained PR agents.

Small in size. Vast in presence.

Ruby, the eldest, is loving, sociable and gloriously intense. Deeply affectionate. If she could, she’d lick you for 24 hours straight. Sometimes she licks the wind instead.

Wheels are not to be trusted — history made that clear.

Wide driveways? Suspicious. There could be wheels lurking.

Lulu walks like a lady. More diplomat than drama queen. Effortlessly composed. She does not approve of showers or hairdryers. She prefers people to assume she woke up like this.

Both ladies are bilingual — fluent in Spanish and English.

Their favourite words are walk- and food-adjacent:

“Biscuitina.” (biscuit)

“Paquiño.” (cookie)

“Pollo.” (chicken)

Hunters, allegedly. Birds. Toy birds. Toy mice.

Anything that chirps, squeaks or tweets.

Human socks are also fair game — stalked, claimed, proudly paraded.

Pre-loved preferred.

According to their mother, they are perfect.

We’re inclined to agree.